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1. I've been (finally) posting my albums of 2010 list over at my music blog for the past few days. Check it out here if you are so inclined. I've still yet to post my number one but that will be coming sometime tomorrow, probably early in the day as there's really no point in holding it back since, to me, it's very obvious anyway.

2. I haven't really been good about mentioning it here but I've also been posting bits of the novel I started during NaNoWriMo, Swan Dive, over at my Dreamwidth. (I know, I have too many journals to keep up with.) As far as the chapters go, the ones that have no date beside them I pretty much haven't touched since I first wrote them back in November, the ones that say "updated" have been edited/vastly improved and "new" means, obviously, that they are newly written. I've basically just been adding them as I go along but I haven't written much apart from outline notes in a week or two. I'm going to try to get back into the real thing soon.

3. I am SO EXCITED FOR THE NEW ELECTED ALBUM, HOLY SHIT! I had honestly resigned myself at some point last year to the fact that it was never going to happen so the news basically blew my mind. So unexpected! I really hope Blake can still deliver the goods after so long. Truthfully, though, I have more faith in him than Jenny at this point. After all, he did write one of the best songs on Under the Blacklight and it was also just about the only song that sounded like it was written in more than ten minutes lyrics-wise. So I'm not too concerned. Plus he's been silent for so damn long he must be sitting on a masterpiece by now.

4. I am going to be posting a few of these one after the other in quick succession in an attempt to get reasonably caught up to where I am now (which isn't going to happen because I'm playing as I'm posting, haha). So... enjoy or scroll past, your choice.



Are you ready for a stunning revelation, everybody? Bradley still continues to be the most boring, non-rebellious college student on the face of the Sim earth. Well, I guess you never know when you might need to pull out some impressive dart-throwing skills in life so at least there's that.



...Or not. I'm not sure he quite grasps the concept of this game. You're supposed to aim for the bulls-eye, Bradley, dear, not just the board in general.



Meanwhile, Abel is lost and lonely without his beloved Ben there to stalk. He decides maybe Bianca will be a sufficient replacement. I mean, they do look sort of alike, don't they?... if you squint... in the dark... without your prescription eyeglasses on.
Bianca: My wonky-eye radar is telling me this guy is a weirdo and a creep. Please remove him from my immediate vicinity.



Abel: I'm just going to stand here awhile and pretend to be working on my yoga poses. She'll have to notice me eventually, won't she?



Bianca: DAMN IT, I TOLD YOU TO GET THIS FREAK OF NATURE AWAY FROM ME! WHAT PART OF THAT DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND?!?



Bianca: Seriously, do not ever fucking want.



Because it is of the utmost importance that we keep Princess Bianca pleased, Kent is invited over for a romantic rendezvous, which mostly consists of hours of slow-dancing.



Meanwhile, this young townie lady is not impressed by the goods Bradley has to offer.



Bradley: Please, we are clearly on entirely different levels anyway. I would've passed you up regardless.



To hopefully spice life up at the dormitory, Bradley and Bianca's kid siblings are invited over for a house party. HEY, GUYS, LONG TIME NO SEE!!!
Bree: Hopefully, I'll find a guy who will agree to my engagement proposal here. All the men back home are so uptight, God!
Brendan: Shocking news, everyone, my sister is still a psycho! Now where are all the sexy babes?



Bree: So, tell me, big sis, are all of the men here devastatingly attractive...



Bree: And are they interested in the goods I have to offer them?
(Girl, you are not being very discreet about what those, ahem, "goods" are.)



Bianca: I get what you are saying and the answer is... DEFINITELY.



Bree's mind = BLOWN OUT OF THE GODDAMN STRATOSPHERE.



Meanwhile, Brendan is attempting to ask his brother for relationship device which, honestly, I'm not sure is going to work out. Bradley's not exactly the most experienced and knowledgeable source out there.
Brendan: Alright, so let me get this straight, first I tell them how much more attractive they look with make-up on.



Brendan: And then I tell them the shoes they're wearing make their feet look, like, totally hot.
Bradley: Yeah, dude, that's all you have to do. They'll be on you like flies, I swear!



Brendan: Come on, you can do this, just play it cool. People making out to the back, uber-attractive babe up ahead. THIS IS TOTALLY AWESOME!



Brendan: Ugh, but the cuisine certainly leaves a lot to be desired. *barfs*



Bianca: OH MY GOD, SIS, LOOK AT THAT TOTALLY AMAZING THING I AM NOT MAKING UP AT ALL OVER THERE!
Bree: Wh - where - what it is it?!?



Bianca: HAHAHA, GOTCHA!



Bree: What the fuck, bitch? That was completely uncalled for!



Bree: OH MY GOD, SIS, LOOK AT THAT TOTALLY AMAZING THING YOU'RE GOING TO FALL FOR EVEN THOUGH I ALREADY DID!
Bianca: Wh - where - what it is it?!?



Bianca: Wait a minute, I don't see anything. What's going on here?
Bree: HAHAHA, HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW?!?



Bianca: OH, SISTER, THAT IS JUST SO FUCKING HILARIOUS! LOOK AT HOW GENUINELY I AM LAUGHING SINCE THAT WAS SO FUCKING HILARIOUS!
Bree: Geez, you don't have to be all sarcastic about it...



Bree: I WILL MOST DEFINITELY BE BACK TO RULE THIS SCHOOL, BITCHES!



Shortly after, it is time for Bradley to say goodbye to university life. Unfortunately for his self-confidence, Bianca is the only one who seems to notice.
Bianca: Oh my gosh, you're leaving?!? I didn't even know you were still here! Well... see ya later, I guess!
Bradley: I think I'm just going to go off myself now.



Actually, instead of offing himself, he moved back home and went to bed with Dollie first things first. Just to make me angry, I know.
Brendan: Oh my God, can I stay and watch? I need you to teach me your ways!
Bradley: Dude, WTF?!? No. Now get the hell out of here.



Brendan: Well, fine, if you're going to be like that then I don't want to watch anymore anyway. *secretly still really wants to watch*



Dollie: It's so wrong... BUT I CAN'T HELP IT! IT FEELS SO GODDAMN RIGHT!



Anyway, as we learned last update, Dollie has turned ridiculously boring and as adorable as she juggles these coffee cups, it's just not enough to make me want to keep her around. So I had her lose weight and then turned her into a townie. Good riddance and everything.



Bree: Yeah, so, anyway, I told this guy I wanted to have his babies and he was totally against - WHAT THE FUCK, PARENTS BEING GROSS AND AFFECTIONATE WITH EACH OTHER, GOTTA GO THROW UP NOW!



Since Bree isn't having much look with the menfolk, she decided maybe she'd have better luck at the poker table.



Bree: I don't even know the damn rules of this game. Have I got a good hand or what?



The Townie Formerly Known as Elliott does not have a very convincing poker face.



BUT IS SHE NOT THE MOST FUCKING ADORABLE THING ON THE PLANET OR WHAT?!? Seriously, girl is making me fall in love with her all over again. <333 I adore you, one-third of the best generation of Newburys of them all.



Bree: Goddamn it, this game fucking sucks!



Elliott (whose new name I cannot remember): *bes generally adorable*



Bree: SERIOUSLY, THIS SHIT IS HARDER THAN IT LOOKS! ALSO, I'M PRETTY SURE IT'S RIGGED, OKAY?!? I GIVE UP!



Bree: OH YEAH, AND I THINK YOU'RE FUCKING UGLY WITH THAT STUPID PERFECTLY WINDBLOWN BEAUTIFUL BLOND HAIR OF YOURS SO SUCK ON THAT, CHEATER!
Yeah, methinks someone is a bit of a sore loser.



Bree: Mmm, that pork chop really hit the spot tonight.
Townie Boy: HOT DAMN, GIRL, CALL ME UP SOMETIME! YOU ARE ONE SEXY NUMBER!



Bree: Seriously now?!? You expect me to procreate with these losers? UM, PASS!



Since she is not impressed with the manmeat on offer, she finds a new game that she hopes she can better understand the rules of.
Elliott: Oh, you again. You couldn't beat me before. You sure you want to test your luck again?



Bree: OH MY GOD, I DID IT! I ACTUALLY WON SOMETHING!
Elliott: Fuck. My winning streak has ended. My life is over.



Bree: WHO'S THE BEST NOW, FUCKERS?!? ME, THAT'S WHO!



Bree: Oh God, for real? WHERE ARE ALL OF THE MALE MODELS IN THIS GODFORSAKEN TOWN?!? I CAN'T MAKE BABIES WITH JUST ANYONE, YOU KNOW!



Bree: You. Are. An. Ugly. Beast. Now get the fuck out mah face.



Bree: Alright, I think that's everyone. Can I go to college now or what???
Girl, if you're going to be this difficult to please your entire life, I'm not sure I can cheer you on for heir anymore.

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Shannon

January 2012

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